Grief can bring copious amounts of anger out of people and I realized long ago that grief and anger are very deeply intertwined. I realized after posting yesterday that some of my posts can get to sounding quite bitter and I think yesterday’s fit very well into that category. Those of you who know me know that I am not a bitter person, but blogging being what it is, and human emotion being what it is…well, you know how things happen.
My Christian perspective is such that I, on one hand, know and trust that God is taking care of me. On the other hand, I ask lots of questions about just how that care is accomplished. I am the petulant child who may ask, “Are we there yet?” or “Why? Why? Why?” over and over. Fortunately, God’s grace is bigger than my questions. I may not know (or get) all the answers, but I guess that’s where faith steps in to take a hand.
However, what I choose to do with my questions is where Christian perspective comes in again.
I am mad about my friend’s diagnosis of cancer. I am still getting over that one, and this morning God and I had an extended discussion about it all. I presented my argument, and there was no flash from the sky as to what course of action will be taken from here on out. So it is left for me to trust that God has this entire situation in His hands, in His heart, even, and will, as a loving Parent, care for all of us so deeply affected by this latest shift in reality. (Faith is being sure of what we hope for, and all that… – Heb 11:1)
The trick is to keep talking, to keep praying, to keep moving, to keep on keeping on. The goal is not 100% understanding, but rather, trust. And faith.
“Keep me safe, O God, for in You I take refuge…” (Ps 16)
